God's Purpose for the Husband and Wife. --God made from the man a woman, to
be a companion and helpmeet for him, to be one with him, to cheer, encourage,
and bless him, he in his turn to be her strong helper. All who enter into
matrimonial relations with a holy purpose--the husband to obtain the pure
affections of a woman's heart, the wife to soften and improve her husband's
character and give it completeness--fulfill God's purpose for them.
Christ came not to destroy this institution, but to restore it to its
original sanctity and elevation. He came to restore the moral image of God in
man, and He began His work by sanctioning the marriage relation.
He who gave Eve to Adam as a helpmeet performed His first miracle at a
marriage festival. In the festal hall where friends and kindred rejoiced
together, Christ began His public ministry. Thus He sanctioned marriage,
recognizing it as an institution that He Himself had established. He ordained
that men and women should be united in holy wedlock, to rear families whose
members, crowned with honour, should be recognised as members of the family
above.
Jesus Wants Happy Marriages. --The divine love emanating from Christ never
destroys human love, but includes it. By it human love is refined and purified,
elevated and ennobled. Human love can never bear its precious fruit until it is
united with the divine nature and trained to grow heavenward. Jesus wants to see
happy marriages, happy firesides. Like every other one of God's good gifts entrusted to the keeping of
humanity, marriage has been perverted by sin; but it is the purpose of the
gospel to restore its purity and beauty. . . .
The grace of Christ, and this alone, can make this institution what God
designed it should be--an agent for the blessing and uplifting of humanity. And
thus the families of earth, in their unity and peace and love, may represent the
family of heaven.
The condition of society presents a sad comment upon Heaven's ideal of this
sacred relation. Yet even for those who have found bitterness and disappointment
where they had hoped for companionship and joy, the gospel of Christ offers a
solace.
A Joyous Occasion. --The Scriptures state that both Jesus and His disciples
were called to this marriage feast [at Cana]. Christ has given Christians no
sanction to say when invited to a marriage, We ought not to be present on so
joyous an occasion. By attending this feast Christ taught that He would have us
rejoice with those who do rejoice in the observance of His statutes. He never
discouraged the innocent festivities of mankind when carried on in accordance
with the laws of Heaven. A gathering that Christ honoured by His presence, it is
right that His followers should attend. After attending this feast, Christ
attended many others, sanctifying them by His presence and instruction.
Display, Extravagance, and Hilarity Are Inappropriate At Weddings. --Marriage
ceremonies are made matters of display, extravagance, and self-indulgence. But
if the contracting parties are agreed in religious belief and practice, and
everything is consistent, and the ceremony be conducted without display and extravagance, marriage at this time
need not be displeasing to God.
There is no reason why we should make great parade or display, even if the
parties were perfectly suited to each other.
It has always seemed so very inappropriate to me to see the marriage
ordinance associated with hilarity and glee and a pretense of something. No. It
is an ordinance ordained of God, to be looked upon with the greatest solemnity.
As the family relation is formed here below, it is to give a demonstration of
what they shall be, the family in heaven above. The glory of God is ever to be
made first.
A Wedding in Mrs. White's Home. --About 11 a.m. Tuesday our large dining room
was prepared for the wedding ceremony. Brother B officiated in the service, and
it passed off nicely. The request was made . . . that Sister White should offer
prayer after the marriage ceremony. The Lord gave me special freedom. My heart
was softened and subdued by the Spirit of God. On this occasion there were no
light jests or foolish sayings: everything was solemn and sacred in connection
with this marriage. Everything was of an elevating character and deeply
impressive. The Lord sanctified this marriage, and these two now unite their
interests to work in the mission field, to seek and to save them that are lost.
God will bless them in their work if they walk humbly with Him, leaning wholly
upon His promises.
The Blending of Two Lives. [* NOTE: REMARKS BY MRS. E. G. WHITE ON THE
OCCASION OF A WEDDING CEREMONY AT SANITARIUM CALIFORNIA, IN 1905.]--This is an
important period in the history of the ones who have stood before you to unite their interests, their sympathies, their love, their labour,
with each other in the ministry of the saving of souls. In the marriage relation
there is a very important step taken--the blending of two lives into one. . . .
It is in accord with the will of God that man and wife should be linked together
in His work, to carry it forward in a wholeness and a holiness. They can do
this.
The blessing of God in the home where this union shall exist is as the
sunshine of heaven, because it is the Lord's ordained will that man and wife
should be linked together in holy bonds of union, under Jesus Christ, with Him
to control, and His spirit to guide. . . .
God wants the home to be the happiest place on earth, the very symbol of the
home in heaven. Bearing the marriage responsibilities in the home, linking their
interests with Jesus Christ, leaning upon His arm and His assurance, husband and
wife may share a happiness in this union that angels of God commend.
Marriage does not lessen their usefulness, but strengthens it. They may make
that married life a ministry to win souls to Christ; and I know whereof I speak,
because for thirty-six years my husband and I were united, and we went
everywhere that the Lord said Go. In this matter we know that we have the
commendation of God in the marriage relation. Therefore it is a solemn
ordinance. . . .
And now I can at this time take by the hand this our brother; . . . and we
take by the hand you, his wife, and urge you to carry on the work of God
unitedly. I would say, Make God your counsellor. Blend, blend together.
Counsel to a Newly Wedded Pair. --My Dear Brother and Sister: You have united
in a lifelong covenant. Your education in married life has begun. The first year of married
life is a year of experience, a year in which husband and wife learn each
other's different traits of character, as a child learns lessons in school. In
this, the first year of your married life, let there be no chapters that will
mar your future happiness. . . .
My brother, your wife's time and strength and happiness are now bound up with
yours. Your influence over her may be a savour of life unto life or of death
unto death. Be very careful not to spoil her life.
My sister, you are now to learn your first practical lessons in regard to the
responsibilities of married life. Be sure to learn these lessons faithfully day
by day. . . . Guard constantly against giving way to selfishness.
In your life union your affections are to be tributary to each other's
happiness. Each is to minister to the happiness of the other. This is the will
of God concerning you. But while you are to blend as one, neither of you is to
lose his or her individuality in the other. God is the owner of your
individuality. Of Him you are to ask: What is right? What is wrong? How may I
best fulfill the purpose of my creation?
A Pledge Before Heavenly Witnesses. --God has ordained that there should be
perfect love and harmony between those who enter into the marriage relation. Let
bride and bridegroom, in the presence of the heavenly universe, pledge
themselves to love each other as God has ordained they should. . . . The wife is
to respect and reverence her husband, and the husband is to love and cherish his
wife.
Men and women, at the beginning of married life, should reconsecrate
themselves to God. Be as true as steel to your marriage vows, refusing, in thought, word, or
deed, to spoil your record as a man who fears God and obeys His commandments.